sowiz your invidible.. I can sea mesen wen a type.. so a dunt no wots guin on der.

busalong as yanot invidble to us poopies art here then it dunt matta duz it?

wee still lubya. xx

We iz invizibul coz we is Speshal Agents

Heckie (code name Lion Pawz)

I ates to tells you Lion Paws, but I can sees you!

Or is it just springs dat can see you, lets seed if any ooomans replied, or dat pesky cat!!!

Speshal Agent Socks ( also knowns as Marley!)

and lets dis be a lesson to any of youse bad doggies owners out there, us gundogs aren't to messed with.....

Warning......

Deer Ellie ( I is too pawlite to call yoo smellie) but fanx foor admirring mi cat work

Deer Marlster. I az look and we az 2 spar drars in da howse so yoo can send over yoor pwoblem catz.

Dea Mista W I iz sorri to here abowt dia rea it souns orribul an I am not lettin no Makeef wuman in dis howse. I will az to bite her.

I iz piktered wiv my new sista Tess. wot a pain in da bum she iz. Mommi sez I iz soolkin but I don care. I az room im me mowf for awl me toyz.

Your Fren Jerry

I az pootteled in to sai "Ello" ant dhat dhe Oomans seem to av sorted owt dhe invisibellity fing

Nut mouch to report to yoos dhis weak dho

Laidee Dinks az bin merdeerin agin az she caim bak wiv sum scalee legz stikkin owt ov er mouff yezturdai. I finks she iz a bit antee Cwristmaz az I finks to cud av bin dhe Robeen frum dhe gardin

Dhe sqiggels av bin stin on mi fense ant dowin moonees at uz but we av fownd dher nuts oup dhe gardin

My hummock az bin put awaz until dhe Spring

Antee Sealeena az sent froo dhe Spagnol Noosletter ant I av red dhat toodai. It az lotz ov pikturs ov uz spagnols in it I finks I iz gowin to azk iv I can bee on paige free ov dhe next edikshun

Deer Marlee,

I dus nut maik mor washin oup fur mi Mommy. I eets strait frum dhe fud bin. Iv yoos ar cleva yoos can ulsew work dhe peedul bin. I leerned to do dhiz avter I watshud dhe Boreded Corlees at Crooftz doin Flies Borlz (but whys aniwon wud wont to run over herdels, chaze a borl ant bwing it bak to sum histeerikul Ooman, I dus nut kno). Yoos av to poot yoor poor on dhe peedul ant dhe mouff ov dhe bin opins. Yoos az to keep yoor poor in dhe peedul ant git yoor hed froo dhe mouff ant snuffel dhe tit bites. Ooomans frow owt sum vwerry gud snakketts too. Liks teebugs, pootatoe peal, bred wiv added green fuzzy stoouf ant youssed tisswe papper. Happee hunntin my fwrends

love frum,

Winston xx

Deer Mr W,

I as a pwoblem. I as been round and rounds de bin buts I couldn't find the magic peedul!!

I iz very dissapointed on dis coz I dus like human snakkettes, I knows I likes tissues and defo teabags, they're yum but Jen gets mad when I takes dem apart on the hall carpet. I fink she's rude actually I dunt see her eatin off the kitchen floor why shoulds I??!!!

Also I dus nut maik mor washin oup fur mi mum either. Instead I tries to helps me selfs strsights off the counter. She dunt likes dat so she must likes doin the washin up! Actually nows I finks of it I aint never seed her washin up, but we do ave a big monster in the kitchen wat likes to lick de dishes clean. I iznt appy bouts dat coz I finks dat I would be good at dat job so sometimes Jen lets me dus the pre wash first and I gets de best bits before the dish munsta does!

Also I as a nover question for you Mr W. Wat's de difference between spagnol and spabol? Coz Jen says we're avin spagbol for tea and I'm not sure I wants any!!!

Marlster

PS wat's a sqiggel?

Ouh me love's to chase dees little things and leave me mum wondering where ive gone but den i does dis squeeely bark coz it as runded up a tree and i cant get to it! Ive teached georgie dee tecqniks dat i use for dee sgiggle hunterering , i az never cort one yet doh! ...dont tell n e one tho

dear Marlster
I've been talking to my big brother Barns about your bin problem and he's got the answer. Human are cunning and sometimes they buy one without the pedal - ours is like that. What barns does is grab hold of the white plastic bit that hangs down and pull really hard - these bins are usually tall and they fall over really well and all the lovely gungy stuff comes rolling out. Barns says you've got to be quick 'cause the humans hear the crash - he's a wise old dog and can do it in seconds. Hope that helps.
I don't know about the spagnol/spagbol thing - I should avoid it if I was you you don't want to turn into a canine cannonball!!

Barks and licks - Bella

Dear Mr Winstun

My mum an dad ave been tawkin about sumfing called chris mouse - we iz all havin one this year. I livd in a kennul before I came to liv ere an wundered if dis chris mouse is like the mouses dat used to cum near the kennul. I knows I iz raw fed but I dusn't want mowses to eat

Mum sez we ave all got stokings wiv our names on an she is goin to fill em for us - wot iz she on about ? I play wiv mumz sock an tek em to her an she fills em wiv her feet - I iz one very confused an a bit worrid ...........


............. Hector

Deer Ector,

Dhere iz nuffink to wurry aboot Chris Mouse az he iz nut a akchewal mouse. Chris Mouse iz a dai wen Santer Pawz bwrings uz ant udder spagnols prezents wen it iz dark ant coald in Deecember. He allsew leeves prezents fur owr Mommys ant Da Da's wich, iv yoo iz qick, yoo kan git to befur dhay do

I iz nut too sur aboot dhe stockins dho az I fhort dhat bank rubbers wor dhem on dhere heds................ or az yoor Mommy takin oup Poll Dancin? Or iz she frum Lap land az dhay doo dancin too ant corl it Lap dancin ant I finks dhat dhay weer stockins but nut on dhere heds,

Wil speek wiv yoos soon,

Winston xx

am glad yoo sortid dat art with chris mouse ... i war startin to git panickin! I don't lyke meeces.. me olly copticus wiv his ate legs scares em off for me.

me mum was also sayin dat she is duin a stockin for me n my new bruvver Winston... we haven't got him yet, coz he is a coffin wiv summat called kennel coff.. I dunt no wot dat is.. I just got a snitty snoffer and keep sneezin.. is dat owt to wurry abart?

the stockin dat me mum iz duin is rite teeny... it won't fit on er ed.. it might fit on er feet... but shez got lotsa lickle bits to sew on it to mek it pwitty.. and it has our name on.. I don't think she lap danzes or owt... it wunt cover much up!

Dear Mr W and fweinds,

Sorri I asnt replyd sooner I az bin a very buzy boy. Fanks four the hadvise abouts the bins Bella, I'm gunna saves dat for when nobobodies ere. At the moments me house always seems to be full, there's a stranger sleepin in MY bedroom now! Please cud someone tell me why she keeps callin me er Godpuppy??!!! I dunt know wat dat means, of course I knows I iz a God but I aint a puppy!

Alsos fanks for de spagbol advice. I as now added dat to my list off fuuds I won't eat. Its a long list ere it is:

prawn cwackers
spagbol

I eats hevryfing else.

Ok I finks we as a mouse called Chris too. I also as a dad called Chris, who apparently will fit downs de Chimney in a few weeks. Now I knows he is skinny but we dunt even av a chimney. an I also seems to as a sock dats too big for me...its hangin on the fireplace. No idea wat I is gunna do with one sock mind, but its got me name of so its defo mine.

Now I as sumfink very funny to tell youse. I fink Jen is lossing it, really propper losin it. Hon Saturday she went out and cumed back with a tree. No big deal cept she's planted it in the living room. She's bonkers!!! She even watered it, she's daft it'll never grow!!!

Marls.

hi marls.

plantin a twee in the 'ouse? dats barmy! me mum got ern out da hole in da roof last neet.... she told me off fur yankin on da branchis, then put bally fings all over it for me to play wiv... now dat's barmy too yeah? Derr's all funny flashin leets on it too.. makes me eyes go all wuzzy!

take care all!

love Holly x